Developing a high level of emotional intelligence (sometimes referred to as EI or EQ) is key to your success as a leader. Enhanced emotional intelligence leads to increased self-awareness, effective emotion management, and a deeper comprehension of others’ emotional states.
Such skills are incredibly valuable when giving feedback to your team. By grasping and implementing the principles of EI, you can turn review and feedback sessions into moments that foster trust, encourage development, elevate performance, and solidify team bonds.
4 Benefits of Infusing EI into Your Feedback
Traditional feedback methods often aren’t beneficial. According to a Forbes article, employees feel most feedback is unfair, biased, or unhelpful. However, incorporating a significant degree of EI into your feedback sessions can reap numerous advantages. Here are four critical benefits to consider.
1. Reduces Defensive Reactions
It’s all too common for team members to react poorly to negative feedback, especially if the recipient hasn’t developed their own EQ-related skills. They may not know the best way to manage their reactions and might become defensive or even hostile. You can stop a defensive response before it happens by delivering feedback in an accepting and empathetic environment based on understanding and support rather than blame.
2. Improves Employee Engagement
Employees who feel appreciated and understood tend to exhibit higher levels of engagement. This heightened engagement boosts motivation, productivity, and dedication to the company. If you encounter retention challenges, the root cause might lie in emotional intelligence.
3. Cultivates a Growth Mindset
Delivering feedback emphasizing emotional intelligence cultivates a growth mindset within the team. This approach alleviates the fear of criticism, empowering employees to take risks and excel in their roles.
4. Builds Trust
Using an emotionally intelligent approach with team members strengthens trust, nurtures robust relationships, and enhances collaboration and teamwork.
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By providing your email address, you agree to receive email communication from ArootahKey Drivers of EI in Feedback
To implement EI-based feedback, you’ll need to focus on the following five key drivers.
Self–Awareness
It’s crucial to be aware of your emotions and cognitive biases and how they might be impacting your feedback; if they are, learn to regulate them so you can provide feedback only from a fact-based mindset.
Empathy
Put yourself in the feedback recipient’s shoes. What’s their perspective? Why have they performed the way they have (either positively or negatively)? How might they respond to your feedback? Anticipate their needs and reasoning.
Self–Regulation
No matter what might happen during the feedback session, regulate your own emotions. Even if the recipient responds poorly, you need to be in control of yourself.
Social Skills
Don’t just focus on what you say to your feedback recipient. For any EI-related effort to be effective, communication must be a give-and-take. Practice active or empathetic listening to understand the other person’s emotions and needs.
Motivation
Always stay focused on the positive. View any negative factors as motivation for growth.
11 Steps for Delivering Feedback with EI
Beyond considering the above five key drivers of EI as you deliver feedback, follow these 11 steps, divided into pre-feedback session, feedback session, and post-feedback session necessities.
1. Preparation: Define Your Objectives
Before scheduling a feedback session, define what you want to get out of it and what you want the recipient to get out of it. Do you need to correct their behavior? Recognize achievements? Find out if there’s any way you can support them? Or a mix of all the above?
2. Preparation: Gather Relevant Information
Remember — EI-based feedback shouldn’t be based on feelings but on facts. For any feedback provided, give data and specific examples that support it.
3. Preparation: Reflect on Your Emotions
Before the feedback session begins, check in with yourself to see if negative emotions arise (such as frustration, anger, or disappointment) and set them aside so you can focus solely on the facts.
4. During Feedback: Create a Safe Environment
Create an environment where your recipient feels comfortable and safe. Avoid settings that may make them distracted, overwhelmed, or intimidated.
5. During Feedback: Start with Positives
Always begin the conversation with what the employee is doing well. Again, give specific examples and data to back this up.
6. During Feedback: Be Specific with Construction
If you work your way into negative feedback, always make it constructive. Give specific examples, and then give similar recommendations about what the employee should have done differently.
7. During Feedback: Use “I” Statements
Don’t base your statements around the recipient. That can lead to defensiveness. Instead of saying, “You missed three of your deadlines,” say, “I noticed three deadlines were missed.” Instead of saying, “Your work is not meeting expectations,” try, “I’ve noticed some challenges in meeting expectations. Can we discuss what might be impacting this and how I can support you?”
8. During Feedback: Be Mindful of Non–Verbal Cues
You don’t just communicate with your words. Ensure that your non-verbal communication is equally positive, open, and non-threatening. Maintain eye contact, nod, and don’t cross your arms.
9. Post–Feedback: Encourage a Two–Way Conversation
After you provide your feedback, don’t just leave the meeting there. Allow the recipient to share their perspective and ask open-ended questions to gauge their emotions.
10. Post–Feedback: Follow Up
After the meeting, be sure to follow up regularly to see how the feedback took hold and what further steps need to be taken.
11. Post–Feedback: Offer Support
Be sure to provide support to help the team member actually accomplish what you’d like to see in the future.
The Bottom Line
Delivering feedback with emotional intelligence is more than a technique; it’s a transformative approach that fosters a culture of trust, growth, and continuous improvement. By understanding and managing your own emotions and empathizing with others, you can create a more positive and productive environment.
To learn more about EI, sign up for our upcoming Emotional Intelligence Panel on October 10th at 6 PM EST. Can’t wait? Hop onto an executive coaching call with an Arootah coach today.
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